"I'm not doing it, you do it."
"I'M NOT doing it either."
This is a well rehearsed spousal exchange. It applies to folding laundry, putting the toilet seat down, taking the trash out, changing air filters, cleaning the muck out of the sink drain and mopping the bathroom floor.
Spouses have been having standoffs since time began. I'm serious. I'd wager good money that at some point George and Martha Washington eyed a kid in a poopy diaper and glared at each other.
"I'm not changing that diaper George. I did it last time, it's your turn."
"Well I'm not doing it Martha... I have a country to run. Who's going to take me seriously with poop on my hand?"
"That's not my problem Georgie. Wear gloves."
And apparently, this scenario applies to Matt & me. Right now there is a cooking pot, lid in place, in our refrigerator that has been there for an indeterminate amount of time. I guess two months, Matt is guessing four. It's lurking in the back behind the lettuce and a jar of applesauce and we have no idea how long it's been there. Or what's in it. That's right. We're gross.
Here's what's happening.
"Matt, are you oblivious to the cooking pot in our fridge or are you purposely ignoring it?"
"I'm purposely ignoring it."
"Do we even know what's in it? You're just waiting for me to do it, aren't you?"
"Liz, I have no idea. It's been that long. And yes, I'm waiting for you to do it."
"Well that's just great. I'm NOT cleaning that out."
"Humph. I'm not either. I have to go play pool w/ the guys tonight and I don't want to get my shirt dirty."
"So? Wear gloves."
And neither side is giving.
So the pot sits there, lid safely in place, taunting us every time we get a snack or make dinner. But I'm not doing it. And neither is he. Fingers crossed that we don't have botulism growing in there. Wish us luck.
* A kindly history buff informed me that Martha & George did not have children together. So, feel free to use your imagination and insert a few other names in their place. Barack & Michelle, Brad & Angelina, Cinderella & Prince Charming. You get the idea.